Our Courtship Days, by Em.

(Slight preface from Jeff, i've been nagging Mother for this story for MONTHS, now i can rest, but remember, Q+A with Granny is a regular feature on BLOG, ask her anything, She'll likely talk Your ear off...;-)).






It was the custom in those days of summer 1946, for young people to go to Sylvan Lake, a popular weekend getaway place, in groups of two or more, stay at the local hotel and join in the fun of beach entertainment and a huge Saturday night dance in the dance hall. My girl-friend Alice and I decided we’d enjoy going, so we saved up our expense money, boarded a Greyhound and arrived in Sylvan Friday evening, excited to join the throngs of holiday-makers. On Saturday night we went to the dance, which was packed to the teeth. And there, (“Some enchanted evening, across a crowded room”) literally across a sea of unfamiliar faces, I spied the brightest yellow shirt I had ever seen. And the guy inside it looked pretty cute too. The shirt was top grade polyester, the latest thing to hit the fashion scene in post-war Edmonton, such clothes, although the demand was high, were simply not available. Well, somehow, Alice and I got to meet Doug and his friend Bobby, I don’t recall how we actually got to meet these two fellows, who had pulled the same stunt as we had, travelled down to Sylvan Lake from Edmonton for the long weekend. I suspect they scoped us out too, probably attracted by Alice’s beautiful blonde hair, but I truly don’t remember who made the first overtures, the guys or us. Bobby, Doug Naylor’s friend, I thought was a complete goof, so he was no attraction to me….Alice ended up with him for the rest of the weekend, but that petered out as soon as we returned to our homes in the city, she wasn’t much interested in him either. But Doug was another proposition. A big plus for him was the fact that he was pumped by the fact his sister had done his packing for him. I always liked that, family should do things for each other, so that was a plus for him.

At that time, Doug worked at Eaton’s as a stock-boy, so he had access to the newest fashiions, hence the beautiful bright-yellow polyester shirt (30 years later, I remember us talking about that shirt, and him saying, “By the way, where is that shirt…..bet you threw it out, didn’t you??”……well, maybe I did, after 300 trips through the laundry, no doubt).

Well, to continue the story, from that moment on, he attached to me like a post-it note. We saw each other every day, except for the one day a week when I claimed exemption to do the girly things with my room-mates, do my laundry, nails, hair, whatever. We got engaged at Christmas time, and set our wedding date for August 4, 1947. I met and became friends with his family, well, sorta friends…..I liked his dad, he was genuine top-quality English. And his sister was fine too, even though she was five years younger than Doug, she was still a teenager, and not yet fully mature. His mom, my future mother-in-law, was another story. Of course, Doug was quite thoroughly spoiled by his doting mother, maybe that’s what I resented, but truthfully, I never really did like her much. Not that we ever had visible differences, never, I respected her position as my husband’s mother too much to allow that scenario. I guess we were just at opposite ends of the spectrum, and I never got over the feeling that she thought her son had married beneath him…..an unsophisticated FARM girl, who didn’t even know how to polish fine furniture! I don’t really mean to diss Eleanor, she had many good points I’m sure, and she was good to us in lots and lots of ways.

And we made it through 57 years, together, and seven children….not without its ups and downs. Doug worked very hard to support us, despite his lack of education (an indifferent student, he quit school after Grade nine), he did his best, we were never rolling in money, but we had sufficient, and I don’t think we ever had to go hungry. I took care of the finances, Doug never wrote a cheque in his whole life, didn’t have a clue. And after the first hurdles of furnishing our house, I chopped up our credit cards and vowed never again would we go into debt for ANYTHING, except for mortgage and car payments. I learned to sew, Doug learned to use power tools and do simple carpentry, and made many things for the kids and our home, we both learned to make do or do without. I learned to cook well, and that helped us out immeasureably when we began catering as a sideline. It certainly helped us over the rough spots, and taught our children some of the aspects of learning to work for a living….they were our ground crew!

My sanity (sometimes!) was preserved by my church membership, a source of never-ending solace, comfort and knowledge that we are on this earth for a purpose, and we have a loving Father in Heaven who watches over us, I often say it was the smartest thing I ever did in my whole life that I elected to join the LDS church (in September 1952). Sadly, my husband never did accept the gospel, and lived to regret it. In his dying days, he declared “I should’ve joined the church”. Our life together would have been idyllic, I now think sometimes when I get to reminiscing about the past….but then again, maybe that’s just wishful thinking!